There are those days when the cold gets all the way inside your bones. By the time you finish your coffee, it’s already 3pm. The sun sits low in the early afternoon. It’s heavy with an idle weight; it’s a deep, deep orange. And She drops fast behind the trees.
Winter aside, even the promise of Spring brews little assurance of newfound warmth. Not the warmth we truly crave. We know heat— stifling, discontenting hot. But we’ve forgotten warmth; the kind that reaches beyond the skin and settles somewhere deeper.
There’s a never-ending list of tasks, carts filled with things we don’t really need, and too many unsubscribe buttons to even bother with anymore. Often life feels designed to keep us behind the 8 ball, unable to fathom the invisible burdens others carry. We snap out of autopilot in the middle of the grocery store, staring blankly, unable to recall why we came in to begin with. The next thing has to be right around the corner. Just a click away. Perfectly succinct categories. Ranch dressing. Easy, dumb convenience.
We exhaust each other with shallow distrust and fleeting opinions, leaving behind only a dull haze of disinterest and emojis. Any original ideas melt away before we get to the next post or story. We virtue signal, or so we’re told. We’re met with distaste. But we aren’t wrong when we’re right, and we’re always right when others are mistaken or too lazy to defend themselves.
To the gods of self-improvement we lift our arms, carefully crafting an image of moral integrity. There is no room for disingenuous mask-wearing, only rhythmic Trikonasanas in Lululemon-scented space pods.
Just name it, we say. Admit to your flaws. Be brave— embrace your damage. Stand united. Happy Black Friday to you too, friend. The curated nature of these truth-vomits, however, just feel hollow. They land flat, even in 4K.
Rather than digging deeper into why we behave a certain way, we settle for broadcasting our supposed growth. Is it praiseworthy? Scroll. Do you have what you need? Scroll. Still virtue signaling. Scroll. And charge, but don’t recharge.
Driving over the median is sometimes the fastest way to Target. Traffic or no traffic. The influencers are equally influenced. And the sunsets go unseen. Yes, we captured the thing of it. Keep moving. Discomfort isn’t welcomed here. There should be no discomfort— None. We’re that advanced; we’re too advanced, maybe. We’ve simply worked too hard. No free shipping? No discussion.
Perhaps, warmth isn’t something we buy—it’s something we create. Could that be? Is it in the pauses, the deeply uncomfortable moments or the short, cold afternoons?
Regardless, She drops fast behind the trees.
Link to audio version. As read by Nathan Tower.